There's a belief in our culture that looking in makes people self-centered, disengaged and separate. Looking out is often considered more engaged and even healthier. The reality is almost a complete reversal.
Looking in, we observe how ideas - our story lines and judgments - actually do keep us self-absorbed. For instance, you might hear yourself frequently judging others, which separates you from them. Or you might hear yourself interpret a new experience so that it fits into an old story line. That separates you from what is.
However, with time, meditation, and great patience, you can experience moments when all ideas and judgments fade. In the silence that arises, you might realize that behind all your opinions and story lines is fear - and behind the fear are some very tender feelings. These are very big tender feelings since everyone has them.
Looking in deeply is to know that we are One.
2/25/2008
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The Psychotherapist's Corner
A meditation-inspired psychotherapy offers people a way of understanding their problems as well as a way of healing them... This full day retreat offers an opportunity to engage in learning mindfulness psychotherapy.
"The approach to working with others that I advocate is one in which spontaneity and humanness is extended to others."
---Chogyam Trungpa Rimposhe
Confusion, though uncomfortable, is a healthy state of mind. That's because it creates a great need for calm and clarity.
Psychotherapists can teach depressed people to become aware of their internal talk. This leads to the insight that thoughts are simply thoughts - nothing more. It also teaches that the person is bigger than his or her thoughts or the depression that comes with them. The result is a greater capacity to cope.
Meditation is a method for moving beyond the isolating tendency of the thinking mind.
Whether in a psychotherapy office or sitting on a cushion, we are practicing awareness. In the psychotherapy office our awareness is trained on the past and on the future. In meditation it is trained on the experience of awareness itself.
Narcissism is a double-edged sword; individuals suffering from narcissism either idealize or devalue themselves and others. Buddhist psychology blunts both sides of this sword by declaring that there is no solid and lasting self. Meditative exercises allow individuals to personally discover that they are ever changing, impermanent, and in the flow of life.
Meditation increases the psychotherapist's capacity for single pointed awareness. Relating in this way to a person who comes for help is an act of deep caring. It heals.
Strange how people come into our offices feeling guilty for trouble that is well beyond human control.
Letting go is a skill that can be taught.
"The approach to working with others that I advocate is one in which spontaneity and humanness is extended to others."
---Chogyam Trungpa Rimposhe
Confusion, though uncomfortable, is a healthy state of mind. That's because it creates a great need for calm and clarity.
Psychotherapists can teach depressed people to become aware of their internal talk. This leads to the insight that thoughts are simply thoughts - nothing more. It also teaches that the person is bigger than his or her thoughts or the depression that comes with them. The result is a greater capacity to cope.
Meditation is a method for moving beyond the isolating tendency of the thinking mind.
Whether in a psychotherapy office or sitting on a cushion, we are practicing awareness. In the psychotherapy office our awareness is trained on the past and on the future. In meditation it is trained on the experience of awareness itself.
Narcissism is a double-edged sword; individuals suffering from narcissism either idealize or devalue themselves and others. Buddhist psychology blunts both sides of this sword by declaring that there is no solid and lasting self. Meditative exercises allow individuals to personally discover that they are ever changing, impermanent, and in the flow of life.
Meditation increases the psychotherapist's capacity for single pointed awareness. Relating in this way to a person who comes for help is an act of deep caring. It heals.
Strange how people come into our offices feeling guilty for trouble that is well beyond human control.
Letting go is a skill that can be taught.
